Do you still remember the chores you had as a child in your parents house?
Are these fond memories? When with the family on Thanksgiving or over Christmas does everyone just fall back into what their chores were as children or not?
Most importantly how do you feel about them?
I remember I learnt to cook at the age of 11, partly because I enjoyed helping my older siblings cook and I would always be busy with them in the kitchen.
But of course when everyone left for boarding school in high school i was well prepared to make a full meal on my own by the age of 13 and also my mom was not very compromising when it came to chores and reality, she would not get back from work and still cook for me 🙂
Later on in life i actually realized she just never liked to cook! Especially after she had not done it for so long!
So we had different tasks in the house and everyone sort of chose what they were comfortable with, my sisters quickly realized cleaning was not my specialty as whatever I did they would still have to go over!
Now this left me with cooking, which I enjoyed and there was peace in the house!
However, now there are grandchildren in the family but somehow the cooking still falls on me, I wonder why? I swear they will make sure I cook before I leave the house for the day even if I have plans to eat out with friends.Even on the days I have had a long night out with friends, come the morning, that’s me on the stove making breakfast, lunch and dinner 🙂 for them!
On the other hand, I was forced to make tea for mom and my sisters and visitors, to date, I hate making tea for people, its just a mental block I get immediately, even if I am in the kitchen cooking, don’t ask me to make you tea! I just fail to understand why anyone would ask me for me!
Does anyone else have this scar for life or is it just me? Please share yours.
Some people will try blow out your candle so theirs can shine
You have worked very hard on a project that is coming into fruition slowly it has not been easy, but you have put in the hours and the tears. No one else knows the sleepless nights you have had just to get this project out!
In certain cases you have been accused of getting a position because you were are female or because of a favorable relationship with decision makers, NO, it was pure hard work, but they do not know that
I was reminded of a biography I read about the very famous Aretha Franklin with her beautiful voice, she says “at times we may be tempted to start questioning ourselves and feel maybe actually they are right, no soldier on” Imagine if she had given up?? She would never have reached platinum album sales, none of her music would be played as best soul songs, why?? Because of criticism?
Misery loves company
Always know that you are shining no matter what they say about you. You have indeed worked very hard to be where you are. Remember when Noah built the Ark they still told him he was wasting his time, until the floods came and they were asking for shelter.
Moral of the story always be prepared to focus on your goals, there will always be someone trying to put you down.
Don’t ever think you stopping me from doing something will discourage me, NO, I will continue to shine.
As long as you have treated people well, good will come back to you.
Your sun seekers will not shine in the shade!
Whatever bad someone has done to me, they will never be reminded by me, I chose to move on!
Have you ever had to deal with a teenager who was not doing too well at school and was at the verge of giving up?
How did you deal with it? All his friends are doing better than him it seems, he has had to repeat classes a few times so it seems all his age mates are ahead of him, this is depressing him no doubt.
No matter how hard he tries it just does not seem to cut it. Extra classes have previously made no difference.
This is a soul you must nurture and hold their hand! And because he is so young he does not know any better or even though you may tell them, at the time they do not understand.
This is when one starts appreciating alternative methods to life skills, not everyone is meant for school!
The biggest challenge has been to let him see that it’s not the end of the world he can still make something of himself in this life.
I have come to learn that failure is part of life. When you fail at one thing it does not define who you are. I tell him!
For me failure just means get up and try again. You may fail at one thing but it does not or should not determine your future.
Not everyone is meant for school and just because someone was not gifted academically does not mean they cannot be good at something else.
My personal challenge at the moment is to show that to a 16 year old. I am determined with love and caring to show him he can make of his life.
Am holding his hand to learn a business skill, which will sustain him for life.
Have you gone through a similar situation, how did you deal with it? Did you have a mentor helping you?
Do you know how to ride a bicycle? Do you remember how you learnt?
To some people this may sound like a stupid and obvious question, their dad taught them! And when they fell there was someone to pick them up and bathe them with dettol!!
But to someone else this is a serious challenge! They had to learn at spinning class at the gym later on in life. For some people this was their first chance to ever get on one!
For some people growing up to have a bicycle was a privilege only a few had. At the flats where I grew up I remember only one child had a bicycle and all the children in the neighbourhood would get a chance to ride it, with or without the parents knowledge.
I remember my neighbour had a bicycle and no one else in the neighbourhood had. He was a best friend to all the children around the block! Whatever he asked for I swear he got it from us. Just as long as we got a chance to ride his bike.
Children playing in the street
We would stand on different pole ends and cycle from one pole to the next. Luckily he was not smart enough to charge us for the ride, can you imagine all our pocket money would only go to him, he would have been a millionaire by now.
This would go on the whole day, but when the parents got back from work we would all somehow disappear because on the few occasions we got caught, the bicycle was taken away.
And no we did not want this precious toy to be taken away from us, so we would have “community police” on the watch to alert us should the parents be on their way back from home or be spotted on their way back.
Some of the parents in the neighbourhood would see us during the day on this very exciting game and would not care. But some like my mother was a party pooper she caught me once and I regretted it bitterly, she told me if she ever found out I was on that bike, life as I knew it would change!!! And she was very good at keeping promises. Jeesh I really thought she hated me! She didn’t want me to have fun!
I had to duck into the bush if she happened to for some reason I never understood come home early on that particular day. I remember one day letting go of the bike and flying into the bush, I knew then life was unfair.
Those were the good times, we had fun, I knew then I wanted to work hard in order to afford that bicycle! I would never even dare ask my mom to get me one as she could not afford it!
This I used as a motivation for myself to work harder and be better than my circumstances! I wanted my own things, I knew being second best had to be a temporary situation.
Only through hard work I could get it right! I am determined to focus even if that’s the last thing I ever have to do!
Sometimes life throws you so many punches and it seems like there is no one around you can turn to!
You have a dream that only you believe in, the people closest to you think it’s a pipe dream that you need to quickly wake up from it! It will never happen, be realistic, they say!
It doesn’t matter how much you have been discouraged, your candle is still shining. Your heart is in there and you want it.
I have learnt in life, it’s not everyone who will agree with you, but you just have to walk alone.
Follow your dream with all your might, if you fail it’s not for lack of trying, you gave it your best.
Please share yours, I would like to hear them:-)